Marissa Banker //January 27, 2014//
Overextending ourselves with work, family and extra-curricular activities is a common problem—and yet, it can be the number one career mistake according to American leadership coach and bestselling author of several work management books, Marshall Goldsmith.
A study by University of North Carolina Chapel Hill researchers found we often over-commit because we expect to have more time in the future than we do in the present. Then when time passes, we still can’t (reasonably) fit in that extra work assignment or industry happy hour. What’s more, the idea of saying “no” instills the fear that we’ll lose respect, damage relationships or anger someone important to us, according to the author of the book The Disease to Please.
So what do we do? We say “yes” and try tirelessly to make it work regardless of our schedule. Here’s the deal: saying “yes” to every request doesn’t just leave us overextended, stressed and angry, it can lead to exhaustion, and even worse, illness.
The trick to maintaining our health and sanity, as well as having a better chance at achieving work/life balance, is learning how to say that scary word: “No,” more often. This isn’t about saying “no” to necessary commitments: preparing for that big client meeting or picking your kids up from school. It’s about the one-off requests that have you secretly asking yourself, “How am I going to make this work?”
You can say “no” without compromising relationships, your job or feeling overwhelming guilt. Here are six suggestions:
Need help honing this skill? Ask a company mentor or trusted leader what their advice is for tactfully saying “no” to projects or invitations. Chances are they have their own tricks of the trade that have allowed them to maintain positive relationships and keep their career on track.